Hutcompany, Inc. LLC

1. In retrospect this may already be happening, as I don’t know how to dowload things from the internet.  I should go find a 5-year-old and see what they can teach me about torrents.

2. I will likely be disappointed by the future.

Today my father told me that he would write me an email every day this week…  I like to imagine what it must be like when my parents sit down to write an email.  I think about the questions they would ask and the meticulousness of it all.  The uncertainty of the “did it send?” and then just calling anyway to make sure it did.

I’m sure that someday there will be new technology that I didn’t grow up with – I’ll be confused and my children will laugh at me as they zip circles around me on hover-robot-gene-splicers or whatever.

I was unable to participate in April Fool’s Day this year – the one day a year where lying to the masses is completely acceptable / forgivable! Unfortunately, it just didn’t feel appropriate to punk those around me when I was on a business trip conducting interviews all day.

On 4/1/07 I think I reached my prime. That evening I called my mom with the big news – I had gotten married!! I know, I know, it was crazy! But I explained that my boyfriend had dared me to marry him and then lo-and-behold, we hopped in the car, drove to Atlantic City, and whoa – there it was!

My mom was…. thrilled.

The whole story cracked her up, and her comment was: “I knew one of the kids would do something crazy, and I’m not surprised it’s you!” She was so excited to hear it that by the end of the conversation we were seriously talking about whether my parents could give me some money because of the huge amount I would have saved them on a wedding. At that point she hadn’t even met my boyfriend, but we ended the call with a lot of laughs and the promise that I would bring my husband home for Easter.

This year I considered calling her again and telling the same story, that “no, it really happened this time!” but she beat me to the punch, and I found the following message in my inbox:

“Happy April Fools Jo. Looking forward to your call.”

The dentist was about to start in on my teeth, when he picked up a tool I’d never seen before. He paused and asked:

“You know what this is, right?”

To which I responded yes.  Or – more accurately I rolled my eyes in a way that indicated “no duh.”

In retrospect, I have no idea what that thing was, but (and this shouldn’t have surprised me overly much since I was in a dentist’s office) - It was painful.

I came across this craigslist post by “John”, who seems like he has a pretty good plan for finding a live-in girlfriend:

$800 room for rent in private house females only

I had friends recently who put up an available room and asked people to “Tell us about yourself!” Responses were fairly pandering and cautious. Things like “I party just enough, but not too much!” and that I’m “as clean as you guys are ” were made to provide no other insight into a person’s personality than their eagerness to please.I was unimpressed. I say if you’re going to be moving in with somebody you need to throw it all out there and really let people know what they’re getting. So, here it is, my apartment personal ad:

Hello –

I’m currently seeking a hypothetical apartment. I’m a pretty relaxed roommate, but don’t eat too much of my food. If anything, I’m kind of hoping you eat entirely different food than me so that we don’t need to worry about who-bought / ate what. Speaking of the kitchen, I’m not at all anal about dishes – I tend not to do my dishes for 2, sometimes 3 weeks at a time, so no worries there. Do I ‘party?’ Well, I wouldn’t describe myself as a partier. I’m more of a bowler really, though if you like to have parties that’s ok too – I’ll probably attend them for a little while. Anyhow, let me know what you think. Also, I come with a 46″ HD TV & a Wii.

- Joanna